When your normal routine consists of lots of hustle and bustle, from working all day to running errands and really only coming together as a couple in the evenings, then everything coming to a halt, can take some major adjusting. You may have been used to coming together mainly on the weekends, while the week was hit or miss. For some couples being locked down in a home together may be a dream, while for others it may bring some hardship and difficulty. Although, after several weeks go by, even the most devoted and healthiest couples may find the extra togetherness a bit overwhelming and begin to feel a little stir-crazy. However being in a pandemic and having to quarantine with your spouse doesn’t have to be a nightmare, in fact it could be an opportunity to strengthen your relationship. So lets discuss some ways that your relationship can remain intact while maintaining harmony.
Seek God first
With so many uncertainties and unknowns all around, fear can become all consuming, whether that fear is wrapped in the possibility of getting COVID or that there won’t be any toilet paper left in stores when your family needs some. So the best thing a person can do for themselves as well as for their relationship is to cling to the unchanging source of love, peace, strength, and comfort; God. A pandemic can bring a new weight to our shoulders and the only way to lift that burden is to run to God’s truth and promises. “ He will cover you with his feathers. He will shelter you with his wings” (Psalms 91:4). The time is now to not worry about anything but to pray about everything and then be thankful (Phil. 4:6). The best thing you can do with all the free time you now have is to seek God first: spend time in His word, pray together with your spouse, walk through a devotional with your kids but above all else run to God.
Communication is always a vital component to a healthy relationship, however when quarantined together it becomes crucial. Take time each day to really listen to one another. Share your concerns about the crisis, being quarantined together and expectations. Discuss with your spouse how you both can give each other enough space while still being a team. Ask questions like: How much alone time do you need? How can we strengthen our marriage during this time? How can we grow closer to God together? What are some goals we can pursue during this quarantine? When you are starting to feel overwhelmed or frustrated don’t push your spouse away, rather come together, share all you are feeling, and work together at solving any issues that may arise. Confide in each other, be vulnerable, and have compassion towards one another. You will both be processing this time differently so empathize and practice active listening. Respect each other with what is needed.
The responsibilities that worked well before may not work as well while being quarantined. When one person feels like they are left to do all the household chores, work tasks, and childcare while the other does whatever they want, this can become a source of argument. So to avoid this conflict redefine, renegotiate, and divide up what needs to be done. Decide who will take on what when it comes to the household and what your children may need. With everyone in the house together, and much more consistently, responsibilities need to be balanced out to keep a person from feeling burdened with everything
Make New Memories
Find ways to laugh together, play games, cook something new, redecorate, or tackle areas of your home you haven’t previously had time to do. Whatever you end up doing, do it together with the sole purpose being to draw you closer. Learn to be more affectionate, give longer hugs, kiss no less than ten seconds, take walks together while holding hands and begin to dream together. Treasure this “slow down” time and allow yourself to fall in love with your spouse all over again.
As the world around you crumbles create a safe place within your home, a place full of love and grace. It is then that your relationship will come out on the other side not only intact but much stronger.